Homonymilicious

Today, you get to hear about my favorite homonyms. Why? Because homonyms don't get enough love in the media. You just don't see feature write-ups of the outstanding homonyms like you should. Has VH1 done a countdown show of the world's best homonyms with commentary provided by B-list celebrities and comedians? No. And why not? Homonyms are fantastic, as I'm sure you'd agree.

I think you'll really enjoy my collection here. They're the most luxurious, goatiest, cultured, rockin'est set of homonyms you could imagine.

Cashmere, Kashmir... Many uses, and all of them awesome. Let's explore!

Cashmere Body Suit, $1500. Available at Nordstrom.

Before Angora came along to nose its way into the spotlight, cashmere was the word synonymous with luxurious winter wear. Cold weather clothes are often more bulky than fashionable, but cashmere lets you be warm and fabulous. I saw a picture of Angelina Jolie in a cashmere sweater dress one winter, and I vowed right then that I will own one someday. Oh, yes, I will. And I'll wear my cashmere sweater dress to do my grocery shopping and carpool and everything else. It will be so amazingly soft and warm that I won't take it off until spring.

The Angora bunny. You KNOW that is a lazy damn rabbit.

Next: Kashmir, a beautiful land with a rich culture, ancient history, and lovely people. Nestled against the Great Himalayas in the northwestern portion of the Indian subcontinent, Kashmir is blessed with fertile soil and a temperate climate, making it ideal for growing sometimes finicky crops like asparagus, artichokes, and cherries. Ironically, though the above-discussed goat fiber does originate from Kashmir, the region no longer exports the material, thanks to competition from China. Of course. Unfortunately, Kashmir has been at the center of military and political conflict between India and Pakistan for many years. At this time, Kashmir is jointly administered by India, Pakistan, and China.

I want to go to there.

Third stop on the Cashmere train is brought to you by John Singer Sargent (1856 - 1925), the American painter renowned for exquisite portraiture and landscapes. While many of Sargent's works are breathtaking, my very favorite is a piece called Cashmere (1908). In it, Sargent presents seven poses of his niece, Reine, wrapped in a lovely shawl made of... you know. Sadly, I will never see this painting in person, unless Bill Gates invites me to his house. Because he owns it.

Some billionaires have all the luck.

Finally, I offer for your consideration the song "Kashmir" by Led Zeppelin. This song is wonderful in its own right, but it holds a special place in my heart. When I dated Mr. Boyce, we once became engrossed in a conversation with this song looping in the background. After hearing it ten times, we either had to declare ourselves totally over it or make it our song. It became our song, though we did not dance to it at our wedding. It doesn't really have a good beat for that. In retrospect, though, that would have been quite the memorable first dance. Opportunity lost. Oh, well. Maybe at our fiftieth anniversary party.

While you're rocking out to the above, tell me about your favorite homonyms! Or your favorite cashmere / Kashmir-related story. Or share a link to the cashmere item you covet most. Whichever.